lab rats

Because test scores were so bad last year, they’ve pumped a bunch of money into the dept and now I got me a fully fledged english laboratory; we’ll be doing experiments like making long vowel sounds with tongue fully extended, like, “ngDaaaaaaaa”, “mBaaaaaaa” and so on. Moreover.

I got my own phone line, my own video-projector thing-o built into the ceiling, my own dvweedee player, and big tv, BoomBox, and me is the only one with a desk in the room so I can goof off as much as I like when not <strike>teaching</strike> entertaining.
The drawback is I now have to write lesson plans. The beginning of the first one is going to look like this -> “Pork chops pork chops pork chops pork chops pork chops pork chops chicken livers chicken livers chicken livers chicken livers chicken livers chicken livers chicken livers, steak”. Let me tall ya when you have to do the same thing nine times over, I thank me when I don’t have a lesson plan.
I’m still lobbying to get my own personal assistant. I want them to hire my special friend so I can have a shoulder rub when I’m freaked, or when I’m feeling a bit flat I’d ask her to say ‘squirrel’ or ‘dirty’, or better yet – ‘dirty squirrel’. That always cheers me up.

Yesterday was graduation/ muck up day – they’re only finishing year 9, so it wasn’t too chaotic. Nevertheless, the principal came through and lamented the flour bombing – and commented on the amount of flour that was seized in sting operations before time (I got some to take home and make pancakes with). I tried to tell em that it’s much worse in australia and that at one high school I was at eggs and water bombs and flour etc were hurled at the teachers in their cars as the came to school. And then when *I* was finishing yr12, one of the other guys’ dad owned a plant rental company. We got a bulldozer for the night and flattened a couple of portables. Now that’s high prankology.