Bob ran up the stairs and looking down he realized his shoelace was untied but he couldn’t stop because they were after him so he decided to get to the roof where he’d retie it.“ This is what happens when an author believes that omitting commas can make the narrative sound breathless and racy. Instead it sounds the reverse – it’s heavy and garbled.
– a link I saw at tripledoubleyou, on How To Write Good. Was reminded of how I’ve got a bit of the 1., 3., and 5. happening here.
Although, if you took away empty adverbs 60% of weblogs would disappear right off the net. It’s because people try to get a spoken word quality to their paragraphs, and I know I do it a bit — actually. I’ve become painfully aware of how many people start off their entries with ”So,“.
”So I was waiting in line at the autoteller this morning…“. So drives me up the wall.
Some pretty funny comments as part of this Ad-rag.org competition. It wouldn’t be hard to scoop it all up and make a ‘The Office’ style show focused on the ad biz.
PS. Bob needs more burrs.